Ted – Ted Shiress
Ted is the show’s central character, a comedian, a music-lover, a food-fanatic and a complete arsehole. Ted has Cerebral Palsy which is ironically one of the few things that doesn’t get him down, one could respect him for his fiercely independent attitude if it wasn’t for his fierce hatred of everything around him.
Rachel – Rachel Helena Walsh
Without Rachel Ted would be nothing. Rachel is Ted’s domestic assistant and it is her job to assist Ted with cooking and housework. However unofficially her main duties are providing Ted a buffer, absorbing some of Ted’s anger so the world has to face less of it, Rachel got this role largely due to her emotional strength.
Cassandra – Aisling Bell
There’s only so much bile Rachel can absorb and Cassandra helps with the rest – plus other bodily fluids. Cassandra is a high-class escort, and Ted’s favourite one, for money she will put up with Ted and make him feel desired, a task which is not easy.
Paul Hunt – Drew Davies
Paul is a FICTIONAL character that definitely doesn’t exist. Paul produces the show along with Mat Trow and pops in sometimes to have a chat to Ted with Mat. Paul has absolutely no relation to the show’s real producer Saul Huntman and Paul definitely isn’t Saul’s real name.
Ted Shiress – Writer
Saul Huntman & Mat Trow – producers
Geraint Nott – Cameraman, director & editor.
Hugh Griffiths – Past cameraman, director & editor.